Home Opinion BYU-I'm Single: spring has passed, but where's my ring?

BYU-I’m Single: spring has passed, but where’s my ring?

Okay y’all.

As a BYU-Idaho student, you hear the saying “ring by spring” a lot.

This is my third spring in Rexburg, and I have yet to “receive” a ring.

I have spent a fair amount of the last three years crushing on people, dating around, being in relationships and getting over heartbreaks.

But through all of these experiences, I have learned what it takes to have a healthy relationship, not only with a significant other but with myself.

One of the biggest things, I believe, that makes a difference in a romantic relationship is the relationship you have with yourself. How can someone love you, when you can’t love yourself?

Loving yourself might seem like a dumb place to start when looking for a relationship, but it is the best.

When you love yourself first, your self-worth will not change when someone else becomes involved.

Over a year ago, I was dating a man and he quickly became my world. He made me feel like I was the most important person in the world. I was head-over-heels in love with him.

When we broke up months later, I was crushed. I had placed so much of my worth on the things he told me that when we broke up, everything came crashing down.

I have spent a year working to move on because I let him impact how I saw myself. If I had a solid grasp of myself, I would have walked out of that relationship less of a mess, and with a better idea of who I was.

With these experiences, I have learned three things that helped me learn how to love myself:

  1. Daily self-care
    This can be accomplished through simple things such as taking time for meditation or prayer, exercising for 10 minutes every day, or at night, preparing for the next day.
  2. Find something you are good at and do it
    For me, it was writing. I see myself as a good writer, and I write to help process my thoughts and life events. Find whatever you are good at so you can feel joy and see yourself in a more loving light.
  3. Treat yo self
    In the TV show, Parks and Recreation, two characters go out once a year and have a day of pampering and splurging. This can be a good treat. Now, you don’t have to be as excessive as the TV characters, but you can do something simple such as buying yourself a new outfit that you feel good in or buying a nicer bar of chocolate.

Whether you are in a relationship or not, love yourself and get yourself a chocolate bar.


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